I'm leaving...

I think that I've finally discovered what I want. I know that I can't come to terms with this place and this society of excess. I no longer care about material things, I have no personal ambitions, or I just gave them up after failing to materialize the most elemental dreams anyone can have. The idea of following a conventional life and finding myself stuck in the endless cycle of routine work and consumerism simply scares the hell of me. Now I want to place myself in a context in which life can have a meaning beyond my own needs and desires. If I don't deserve to receive, then I would like to try to give. I want to leave this place, I want to be in a forsaken continent where I can feel needed, where I can share the knowledge and love of history with children, or teach them how to write and read in English, or even in French. It doesn't scare me to abandon the affluence of this society, on the contrary, I fear staying and finding myself lost, without a path in a world of dead passions. I no longer know if I care about going to graduate school, I just want to leave and forget all about this place.